Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
