hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Randomize
