Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
