Three words: puerto rican gang bang
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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