I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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