My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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