I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
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Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
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It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
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