I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize