She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
