Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Randomize
Follow @tfln