the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
