im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
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