I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
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