i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
