is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
