their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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