I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
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