we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize