Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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