Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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