we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Randomize
