Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
