people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
