I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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