I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Found your dick twin last night
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Randomize
