census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I wish i was in the wii world.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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