I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
