you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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