porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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