This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize