Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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