good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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