I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize