it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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