in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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