i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
