I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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