No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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