I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
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