She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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