let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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