I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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