after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Randomize
