Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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