i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Randomize
