Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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