Having a random hookup so left but love u
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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