I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
