this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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