I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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